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Category: Self Esteem
4 Ways How to Find Your Talent

4 Ways How to Find Your Talent

Everyone has a talent – the unique gift that makes you, you. Unfortunately, too many of us get stuck on finding that unique gift. Some people never find their talent because they believe they don’t have one or they haven’t even tried to find it. What we forget is that talent is a natural capacity that we have and that EVERYONE has it. When you identify your talents, you can make a living doing something you are passionate about, something you are good at. How do people find their unique gift and discover their true passions? Does this happen accidentally, by chance? Here are 4 ways how to find your talent if you are willing to make an effort.

1. Go back to your childhood

Revisit your childhood and remember what you imagined when you was playing by yourself as a kid? Close our eyes, relax and think back as far as possible, to the times you were under the age of 6-7, when you weren’t influenced by fears and environment. How you was playing, what did you do, how you was spending your days? What was the most fun and what experiences created the biggest memories? You may find your path if you reinterpret these memories from your childhood and fit them to your adult world.

find your true talent

2. Ask people around you

One way how to find your talent is to ask others. Perhaps people around you are telling you what you are good at but you are not listening. Start paying attention! Ask your family, friends, peers or other trusted persons what they think your unique gift is. They can evaluate you in the ways you cannot evaluate yourself because usually we see ourselves differently than others see us. Ask them about what makes you different, what are your strengths, what they value and love most about you. The biggest challenge with talents is that people usually are used to them and take them for granted. You should ask as many people as possible and compile the results to discover your true talent or at least to get some clues.

3. Discover what you enjoy most and what you spend your money on

Sometimes our hidden talents are not so hidden. They may be showing themselves in different ways. Your passions are linked to what you spend your money and time on.  Simply think about what you love to do and ask yourself these questions: are there topics that you just can’t get enough of? What you spend your money on? Are there books, web pages, movies or TV shows you love? Are there any activities that you find so interesting that you easily lose track of time? These moments of spent time and money will guide you towards your destination and help you to find your unique gift. Don’t rush, take your time to truly discover yourself.

find your true talent

4. Take personality tests to find your strengths

I know you might feel skeptical about personality tests. However, some of the tests can help you to understand yourself better, to find your top strengths and your dominant patterns. You may want to try Briggs Myers’ 16 personality types test, if you haven’t tried yet. The test will give you a pretty accurate description of your strengths and weaknesses. You will get an in-depth information about your top careers, relationships, core motivation. This test was created by Isabel Briggs Myers and her mother, Katherine Briggs on the basis of the theories of psychologist Carl Jung and it is widely used in the areas of pedagogy, career counseling professional and personal development, life coaching and even marriage counseling.

Test alone will not help you. Use the test result along with self-analysis and insights of the people around you. The combination of the steps above should help you to find your unique gift.

55 Thought Provoking Questions to Ask Yourself That Will Change Your Life

55 Thought Provoking Questions to Ask Yourself That Will Change Your Life

The huge majority of people settle for a comfort zone and forget that they have a chance to have deeper, more fulfilling, happier life. Why does this happen? Because people stop challenging themselves and live on autopilot. Many of us fear asking ourselves thought provoking questions because they could push us out of the comfort zone. However, you should not pretend that everything in your life is fine as it is. You deserve to live the life you wish you had! It’s never too late to change the way you live and to feel fulfillment in your work and life. Ask yourself these 55 thought provoking questions that will help you to change your perspective on life. Make sure you are honest with yourself – you have to provoke the needed change and challenge in your life!

1.  Are you happy with who you are right now?

2.  Who are the people you surround yourself with?

3. Do you have personal long-term and short-term goals?

4. Who do you usually compare yourself to?

5. What makes you excited about life?

6. What lessons in your life did you learn the hard way?

7. How often do your biggest fears come true?

8.  How would you describe yourself?

9. What would you do differently in your life if you knew no one would judge you?

10. How would you define your values?

11. Have you done anything you are proud of recently?

12. Do you take the advice of others?

13. How are you spending your money?

14. Are you happy with your job?

15. If you had unlimited resources, how would you change your life?

16. Do you celebrate your small accomplishments?

17. Do you consider yourself worthy of admiration?

18. Are you making the lives of others better?

19. What is the difference between living and existing?

20. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are in reality?

21. What is your biggest dream and biggest fear?

22. What would you do differently in your life 5 years ago?

23. What makes you happy and what makes you down?

24. How do you define success?

25. What would you regret more: failing or never trying?

26. If you could be a different person, who would you like to be?

27. What was the best and worst day in your life and why?

28. Is there something you do differently than most people?

29. What inspires you the most?

30. What is your biggest regret?

31. When was the last time you learnt something new?

32. Do you feel fear to express your opinion?

33. How often do your fears hold you back?

34. What impact do you want to leave on the world?

35. Can there be happiness without sadness?

36. Do you make excuses for yourself?

37. What do you want your life to look like in 10 years?

38. Do you tell ‘I love you’ to the most important person in your life daily?

39. Are you holding on to any of your past mistakes?

40. What is the biggest challenge you’re facing now?

41. How many people do you love and what are you doing for them?

42. If you could ask for one wish, what would that be?

43. Do you listen to people when they talk to you?

44. What character trait do you want to be known for?

45. What bad habits do you want to get rid of?

46. How often do you get in touch with the people you love?

47. What are the top 3 compliments you hear from others about yourself?

48. How would you describe your future in few words?

49. What is your favorite place to be on Earth?

50. What are you an expert at?

51. What are the things that stand between you and your happiness?

52. If you had enough money to never need to work again, how would you spend your time?

53. What motivates you to do better at something?

54. Who did you want to be as a kid?

55. How much control do you have over yourself?

All you need to do to make a change in your life is to start asking yourself these thought provoking questions and begin your journey to discovering what really makes you, you.

How to Increase Your Low Self Esteem?

How to Increase Your Low Self Esteem?

Wouldn’t it be great if you could feel that you can be anyone you want to be and to make your big dreams come true? It is impossible with having a low self esteem.

Low Self Esteem is More Harmful Than You Think

Self esteem is how we think and feel about ourselves. It is more important than you think as It has a great impact on all the areas of our lives. Positive self esteem makes us feel strong, independent and optimistic. Confident people learn from their mistakes and grow instead of blaming themselves. They tend to feel in charge of their own lives and solve problems, they don’t fear rejection and able to say no. Negative self esteem makes person feel weak, incompetent and incapable. People with a low self esteem fear to take risks and make decisions, they tend to not trust anyone. Low self confidence results in blaming behavior, fears and negativity.

Self confidence affects almost everything we do, even if we don’t notice this. Our insecurities often lead to poor decisions. Poor decisions and choices often lead to frustrating relationships, lack of trust, professional difficulties. These difficulties decrease already fragile self esteem and bring a feeling of being trapped in a vicious cycle of negativity. In long-term, low self confidence can lead to certain mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety.

Why Women are Less Confident than Men?

There are many roots of low self esteem. In many cases it has its origins in the childhood and such negative experiences as neglect, parental rejection or abuse. Sometimes it starts because we get a lot of negative messages from our environment (parents, siblings, schoolmates or media) telling us: ‘you are not good enough’. Traumatic life events can also influence our confidence negatively.

Statistically, women tend to be less confident than men. What causes this confidence gap?

According to recent studies, men tend to overestimate their abilities and competence in a professional world, and women underestimate them, even though their performances are the same. Although both genders have self-doubts, men don’t let these doubts affect their decisions. Another factor is risk taking ability. Studies show that most women are afraid of taking risks and trying something out of their comfort zone. The roots of these differences between genders lie in childhood. Girls more than boys are appreciated for being good, so they seek approval by being good. Boys more than girls tease one another, call each other bad words and are appreciated by other boys for being bad. In result, girls try to avoid risks and failure, they fear of being imperfect. Boys do the opposite and as a result, they build their self confidence. According to numerous research findings, failures and risk taking ability are crucial for building a positive self esteem.

How to Get Rid Of Low Self Esteem?

Good news is you can work on yourself and get rid of your low self esteem. There are long-term and instant self esteem boosters. Try a combination of these for the best result.

Long-Term Confidence Boosters

Long-term confidence boosters require consistent and continuous work and self-discipline. The whole process of change is slow, but the result is long-term and worth trying.

1. Change the way you think

Change doesn’t happen overnight, but you can change gradually. Start from giving yourself a positive message and replacing negativity with positivity. For example, replace a thought ‘I made a terrible mistake in a job interview. I will never get hired” with “I made a mistake in a job interview, but I have learned from it. This will increase my chances of nailing a job interview in another company”. These positive thinking strategies will help you as well: avoid exaggerations (especially the negative ones), accept your flaws and mistakes (just because it is so human and nobody is perfect), stop feeling responsible and guilty for everything, focus on your future and on what you can do better. To change your way of thinking and living, you should learn to ignore your negative inner voice. Nobody told it was easy!

2. Understand your strengths

People with positive self esteem are fully aware of their strengths and achievements. The key to building a healthy self confidence is knowing yourself better. If you haven’t done that yet, take a pen and a paper and create two lists: one of your strengths and one of your achievements. Can’t think of anything? Ask your friend or family to help you. When ready, put these lists in a visible place and read them regularly. Always remember that despite your mistakes, flaws and problems, you are a special person and you deserve a good self-treatment. Stop your inner self critic and set perfectionism aside. Remember that nobody is perfect but everybody has strengths. 

3. Take care of your health and body

Physical activity has many benefits to health and body. It can boost your mood, improve your sex life and increase your self esteem. Workout makes human body release chemicals called endorphins, also called brain’s ‘feel-good’ chemicals.  These substances will make you feel happier and more relaxed.  Physical activity may provide you with a double self esteem boost because you may also feel more confident about your appearance and yourself when you workout regularly.

Nutrition also plays a great role in building self confidence. Scientists proved that there is a link between the food we eat and mental health. You should get the right balance of nutrients from your diet to feel better about yourself and to lift your mood. For instance, studies show that people who are not getting enough omega-3 acids are more likely to develop depression. What should you eat to feel more confident? Include these foods in your diet: fruits, vegetables, whole grains, eggs, lean meat, oily fish, low fat cheese, seafood, nuts, beans and seeds. Limit your intake of junk food, alcohol, caffeine and sugar.

Changing your lifestyle as a whole may help significantly improve self esteem.

4. Avoid toxic people and hang out with the positive, supportive ones

Your environment might affect your self confidence in many ways. Identify toxic, unsupportive, negative people in your life and spend less time with them. Spend more time with the open-minded, positive and kind people. Seek out relationships with those who make you feel good, appreciate and support you. Avoid reading articles or watching videos that make you feel bad about yourself. Read something that inspires you daily!

In addition, try to evaluate situations in your life that seem to negatively affect your self esteem. Examples: toxic work environment, unfulfilling job or job loss, crisis at home, unhealthy relationships. Avoid these situations if possible or work towards changing them. 

Try to be kind and positive towards other people, express your gratitude constantly. 

5. Set realistic goals and expectations for yourself

Truth is, you can’t control everything. Your future is unknown, many factors can affect it. You might not become a millionaire by the age of 30 or 40 because of many reasons (and you can’t control all of them). So, set realistic goals and expectations for yourself. It doesn’t mean you should stop challenging yourself, but try to make small steps towards your big dreams. Increase your competence by studying and practicing. By becoming more competent and knowledgeable, you will become more confident. Always value all your achievements (including small ones) and your self esteem with thank you.

6. Avoid comparing yourself to others

Stop comparing yourself to other people and competing with them. Compete against yourself and challenge yourself! Comparing yourself to others is a bad habit and is useless because it’s never fair. You see only part of other people’s lives (usually, a glamorous one they show on their social media profiles), but you don’t know the details. You think other people feel and live better than you, but you don’t know for sure.

You should also stop comparing your appearance with that of celebrities and models. According to recent research 80% of women in U.S. are unhappy with their appearances. Partly that happens because of the society’s idea of the perfect female face and body image. People see the perfect bodies and faces of celebrities and models everywhere: in media, magazines, internet and movies. They compare their bodies and faces to these and start feeling insecure. Remember that celebrities use a lot of makeup, video and photo editing in order to look better.

7. Learn to say no

People with low self esteem fear rejection and try to please everyone. They often feel they can’t say no to other people, even if they really want to. Learning to say no will help you to avoid anger, anxiety and feeling of being unfulfilled. You should not try to become someone you don’t want to. Stop thinking that telling no will upset someone – in most cases that will not happen.

8. Get active, but don’t forget to relax

It is easy to do nothing and stay in your comfort zone. However, it can make you feel less secure! Doing something usually leads to mistakes and failures. But they are crucial for building a healthy confidence and becoming better. So, get active and do unfamiliar things but don’t forget to relax as well. Inability to relax can lead to anxiety, irritability and harm your self confidence.

Instant Low Self Esteem Boosters

Short-term confidence boosters work well for those who need to get an instant, immediate self esteem boost. This is very useful before special life events or stressful, responsible situations such as job interviews, first dates, first day at the new job or school, public presentations, exams and other. Try these instant confidence boosters and help yourself to feel in charge of your success:

1. Look the best you can

Believe it or not but taking care of your appearance can help you to build confidence. Make sure to pay attention to your hygiene, wear clothes that you like and that make you feel good. It is amazing how even a nice perfume and bubble bath can lift your mood!

Preparing for a stressful event or day? Wear your best dress, high heels, put on some makeup and don’t forget to smile!

2. Get a photo session for yourself

Flattering photos will boost your low self esteem instantly. Get a professional photo session or take few pictures of you by yourself using timer on the camera or phone. Pose like a model, don’t be shy, express yourself. Apply some cool photo filters to your picture or let a professional photo editing company work on your pictures. Post a best photo to your social media networks. That works as a powerful self confidence booster for some people, especially younger women.

Related: Photo Editing Services Helping Any Woman Look Alluring in Any Picture

3. Listen to music

According to recent research, music can make you feel more powerful and more confident. It can also boost your mood, increase your creativity and productivity. Similarly as physical activity, listening to music makes your body release chemicals responsible for your happiness.

Grab your iPod and listen to some lively, inspiring tunes!

4. Flirt!

Going to a date but don’t feel confident enough? Or maybe you are going through a tough breakup? Try flirting! Psychologists suggest that you can get an instant confidence boost if you flirt. This works well for both men and women. Flirting helps us feel better about ourselves, lifts our moods and makes us less nervous.

5. Use swear words

Believe it or not, but swearing can make you feel stronger and more relaxed. Something went wrong? Just say ‘f*** this s***!’ and get an instant relief. Numerous studies show that using bad words help to get a significant confidence boost. However, be careful to use this technique in front of your parents, co-workers or boss.

6. Embrace your smile

No matter how low your self esteem is, smiling will help in all situations. Experts say that smile is one of the most effective instant ways to feel happier, stronger and more confident. Smile at the job interview, smile on a date, smile at work and at home, use your sense of humor even in the worst situations.

7. Go shopping

Nothing can help to build your esteem better that buying something nice for yourself. Don’t have nothing to wear to an important life event? Go and buy that killer outfit that makes you look like a celebrity. Both men and women can get an instant mood and confidence boost with a shopping therapy.

8. Get a glass of wine

Although this technique cannot be used in all situations, a glass of wine before a date or after a bad day will definitely help. Most doctors suggest that drinking wine in moderate amount has good effect on mental health, including self confidence. People who consume wine regularly in moderate amounts are less likely to develop depression and anxiety.

9. Meditate or relax your muscles for a few minutes

It will only take you few minutes, but will be well worth it. Short meditation helps to keep your mind stress-free and to appreciate life more, it helps you feel happier and stronger. The next time you feel insecure, just close your eyes, relax your muscles and breathe deeply. You will feel better immediately. This tip is easy but underestimated.

10. Volunteer

Find some time to volunteer for a good cause and help other people or animals. This will help you to feel a better person and boost your confidence instantly.

If you have tried everything but nothing seems to help, you should seek professional advice. Remember that in severe cases low self esteem may require medical treatment and therapy.

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